A punchy and practical column exploring self-awareness, relationships, and the subconscious dynamics secretly running our lives because what you can mention, you can manage. Written by status-quo avoidant writer, communication nerd, and master life coach Alyssa Patmos (soon-to-be Alyssa Kulesa).
sleep, alarms, and bath tubs
Snooze Buttons and Bath TubsPre-P.S. You're reading day 20 of my 32 days of insights, inspiration, and instigation. (Very informal title). Get the full scoop here. ✨ |
"Did you set the alarm?" I despise hearing those five words. #Noalarmclocklife is the name of the game over here and has been for the past five years. In my world, alarm clocks are tiny torture devices designed to assault my senses as they pull me from precious sleep. ⏰☠️ They're a top contender in my list of the worst technology ever created. I'm only excited to set one when I have an early flight to catch and don't trust myself to wake up in time. Nonetheless, I've needed to set the alarm 8 out of the last ten days, which hasn't happened in at least eight years. As a result, I've been thinking about sleep quite a bit. Specifically, these two thoughts have been on my mind: 1). Sleep is treated as a luxury, but unlike the pair of Louboutin booties you've been eyeing for three months that you just know will be uncomfortable, sleep is a necessity. 2). The self-care products industry has distorted self-care by making it seem like self-care is supposed to be sexy. It's not. Lavender-scented bath bombs are not required to take care of yourself. The best self-care can be rather boring because it starts with you, not a product you can buy. The best way to care for yourself is to check in with yourself and see how you're doing. This seems like common sense, but it's fairly uncommon for people to check in with themselves before blaming other people or their surroundings for their problems or jumping straight to the solutions sold by the marketers of the self-care industry. Checking in with yourself means paying attention to things like:
Self-care starts with slowing down and paying attention to your inner world, then choosing which action best supports your needs. Awareness → alignment → action. Sometimes self-care might include a bubble bath, but other times it might look like going for a walk, remembering to breathe, prioritizing creativity because you've been putting others' needs above your own too much lately, people-watching, sitting alone somewhere, calling a friend, etc. (Notice how many of those are 100% free). Unfortunately, social media's equation is more like this: Attention → advertisement → action. Fortunately, sleep is the great reseter of attention. Well-rested and introspective is a great look. Reported side effects: sleeping better, more energy, clearer thinking, better decision making, generally being regarded as a more compassionate human. xx, P.S. If you want more on this stopic, my friend Dr. Sophia Town and I chatted about her model of self-care in this past episode of the show. |
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Make it Mentionable
Alyssa Kulesa
A punchy and practical column exploring self-awareness, relationships, and the subconscious dynamics secretly running our lives because what you can mention, you can manage. Written by status-quo avoidant writer, communication nerd, and master life coach Alyssa Patmos (soon-to-be Alyssa Kulesa).
Hey Reader, I feel a little bit nervous as I let my fingertips brush over my pink keyboard for the first time in what feels like eternity. Anyone who teaches about "building an email list" will tell you A) not to ghost your list for 7 months and B) certainly not to announce you have ghosted them for 7 months upon return. Now that I've done both of those things we can get back to the meat of this email. First, hi. If you're opening this to either 1). remember who the hell I am or 2). because...
Planes, presence, and freshly squeezed orange juice Pre-P.S. You're reading day 25 of my 32 days of insights, inspiration, and instigation. (Very informal title). Get the full scoop here. ✨ We made it to Chicago yesterday! After 16 hours of travel, one better-than-usual but still not great airplane meal, three episodes of The Witch Trials of J.K. Rowling, two episodes of Queen Charlotte, 1 hour waiting for our bags, and 45 minutes in a taxi, we stepped foot into our swanky hotel overlooking...
Screw the swear jar; pay someone a quarter every time you say this instead Pre-P.S. You're reading day 22 of my 32 days of insights, inspiration, and instigation. (Very informal title). Get the full scoop here. ✨ I've decided to avoid learning "should" in Spanish. Our house has no swear jar (it'd be full real fast). Instead of policing swear words, we've banned the word "should" from our conversations. So there's really no point in me learning it in Spanish. Should is a far more damaging word...